Complaint Letter Generator

Have you ever wanted to fire off a complaint letter to a company or individual, but not known exactly what to write? Or maybe a lot was on your mind, but you didn't know exactly how to say it?

If so, then you should visit the Complaint Letter Generator by Scott Pakin. This cool resource will help you spit out a letter in no time.

Not only will your letter be noticed, the near psychotic ramblings will probably end up helping you get your way.

It works for any person or company, no matter what the issue. Just fill in a couple of blanks and create it within seconds. Try it today, it's FREE!

Here is a sample letter I'll write about my good friend Mac:


This letter comes to you in the hope that it will find the place in your mind where rationality resides and where decency and sanity, coupled with a healthy sense of anger, will trigger appropriate action. By way of introduction, let me just say that Mac's lackeys argue that she is a master of precognition, psychokinesis, remote viewing, and other undeveloped human capabilities. These are the same stupid pipsqueaks who commit all sorts of mortal sins—not to mention an uncountable number of venial ones. This is no coincidence; all five of my senses indicate that I certainly reject Mac's demands. So don't feed me any phony baloney about how she should be a given a direct pipeline to the National Treasury. That's just not true.

Mac's position that she can override nature is based upon a specious argument without any substantive basis. Of course, this sounds simple, but in reality, the real issue is simple: Mac deserves to be punished. If I hear her subalterns say, "It is not only acceptable but indeed desirable to make empty promises" one more time, I'm really going to throw up. If a cogent, logical argument entered Mac's brain, no doubt a concussion would result. This is neither a document written in anger nor something I am being paid to write. Why? That's easy. It seems that no one else is telling you that it's quite sad that Mac chooses to squander her talent on this sort of passive-aggressive isolationism. So, since the burden lies with me to tell you that, I suppose I should say a few words on the subject. To begin with, the time is always right to do what is right. That's why we must undeniably move as expeditiously as possible to invigorate the effort to reach solutions by increasing the scope of the inquiry rather than by narrowing or abandoning it. The first step in that process is to realize that if natural selection indeed works by removing the weakest and most genetically unfit members of a species then she is clearly going to be the first to go.

A sure-fire way to elicit derisive sneers, leers, and jeers from Mac is to resolve our disputes without violence. If you don't believe me, see for yourself. She should think about how her memoranda lead rambunctious mouthpieces for silly cameralism to promote the depraved philippics of atrabilious, picayunish peculators. If Mac doesn't want to think that hard, perhaps she should just keep quiet. To recap the main points made in this letter: 1) Mac cannot endure the world of reality and must take refuge in her uppity fantasies, 2) we cannot and we must not allow ourselves to become infected with the fatal germs of alarmism, and 3) she should clean up her act.